White Horse
by N07 H3R3
Summary: One-Shot. This takes place after the famous scene by the lake after O.W.L.s... Lily and Snape's fight... what happens after... read to find out! At first it's Lily/Snape but at the end it changes to Lily/James. Set to the song White Horse by Taylor Swift.


**Teva Faye here! Ok, it's 12:45 in the morning and I wrote this all in one go. I've been wanting to write this for awhile, and I figured it'd help me get over my frequent writer's block. **

**_Bold & Italics - Lyrics_**

_Italics - Words from the book_

**Enjoy! ~Teva**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter books or the song White Horse.**

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**Lily's POV**

**~5****th**** Year~**

_**Say you're sorry  
That face of an angel comes out  
Just when you need it to**_

_"I'm sorry,"_ Severus said pleadingly.

"_I'm not interested,"_ I said. He had called me a Mudblood. We were supposed to be friends.

"_I'm sorry!"_ He said again, as if saying it more than once would prove it was true.

"_Save your breath,"_ I said angrily. I put as much anger into my voice as possible. Under no circumstances was I going to let him know that I was crying inside. But when he said sorry, the look on his face almost made me forgive him. What had happened to the sweet boy I played with? What happened to the boy that I had liked? He had really hurt me, and no matter if I had thought of being more than friends with him, it was impossible. I continued, _"I only came out because Mary told me you were threatening to sleep here."_ At least, that was one of the reasons. I wanted to hear him say sorry. I wanted to hear to boy that had been my best friend.

"_I was,"_ he said, "_I would have done. I never meant to call you a Mudblood, it just…"_

"_Slipped out?"_ I said taking all the pity I had for him out of my voice. Severus had called me a Mudblood. My best friend had called me a Mudblood. _"It's too late. I've made excuses for your for years. None of my friends can understand why I even talk to you. You and your precious little Death Eater friends,"_ I paused, waiting for him to say something, but he doesn't. _"You see, you don't even deny it! You don't even deny that's what you're all aiming to be! You can't wait to join You-Know-Who, can you?"_ I wanted him to deny it. I wanted him to be my best friend again.

He opened his mouth, as if he was going to talk, but he closed it again. I had given him so many chances. I decided to get it over with. "I _can't pretend anymore," _I said. I couldn't pretend a lot of things. That he had let me down, that I had liked him, and that he was hurting me inside. _"You've chosen your way, I've chosen mine."_

"_No,"_ he begged_, "Listen, I didn't mean…"_

"_To call me a Mudblood?"_ I said straining my voice_, "But you call everyone of my birth Mudblood, Severus. Why should I be any different?"_ Unless… did he like me? All these years did he like me and never admit it? I looked at him waiting for him to reply, but he didn't. Before the tears could fall, I turned around and stepped back through the portrait hole.

_**As I pace back and forth all this time  
'Cause I honestly believed in you**_

I walked back into the common room and saw Mary looking at me. She was the only one left in the common room. "Are you okay?" she asked. I nodded. "Are you sure?" she continued. I must've looked bad for Mary to not believe me.

"Yeah," I said as calmly as possible, "But I think I'm gonna stay down here by the fire for a bit. You go up to bed." Mary looked at me worriedly, but she slowly trudged up the stairs to the girls' dormitories. I walked back and forth in front of the fire. Pacing was always a way to reduce my stress.

My thoughts went back to what Severus had said. He said he was sorry, but I had trouble believing him. All these years I believed that he was good, that he was my friend. Apparently, I was wrong.

Suddenly, the portrait opened up. In walked James and Sirius, both trying to hold in their laughter. Obviously, they had just pulled some lame prank. This made me even angrier. I blamed James for my fight with Severus. If James hadn't picked on him, then I would still be friends with Severus. Even though I knew in my heart that Sev would still have called me a Mudblood under different circumstances, that didn't stop me from walking up to the idiots angrily.

"Potter! Black!" I screamed at them, "What were you doing out after hours?"

"Lily," James whispered, "Be quiet, you might wake someone up."

I was temporarily shocked by James calling me Lily, so Sirius piped up. "Yeah, Evans," he whispered, "Don't do anything drastic."

I looked at them. Did they honestly think I was going to let them get away with this? "Detentions!" I yelled, "Both of you!" I stomped towards the staircase and saw students filtering out; trying to see what was all the commotion. I was struck by an awesome idea as turned back to the two Marauders. I smiled sweetly at James and I saw him gulp.

"Evans," he said warily, "Lily, just calm down."

"Oh," I said with honey dripping from my voice, "I am calm. I just think that you need to have a little taste of what you dish out." I saw realization dawn in his hazel eyes right before I yelled, "_Levicorpus_!" All I saw was James and Sirius hoisted up into the air by their ankles before I ran up the stairs into my dormitory. I could still hear laughter as I jumped into bed and pulled the covers over my head.

**~6****th**** Year~**

_**Holdin' on, the days drag on  
Stupid girl, I should've known,  
I should've known**_

It's been an entire summer since Severus and I had our fight. Sixth year has seemed a lot more lonely because we don't talk anymore. Every time I see him in the hallway, I avoid his eyes. I see that he wants to say something to be as I pass, but then I see him look down as his friends point and snigger at me. I was stupid to think that he would have ever defended me in front of them.

_**That I'm not a princess  
This ain't a fairytale  
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet  
Lead her up the stairwell  
This ain't Hollywood,  
This is a small town  
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down  
Now it's too late for you and your White Horse,  
To come around.**_

When they're little, every girl dreams of being a princess. Most of them even have a prince charming with a perfect face riding in on a white horse to take them from the evil witch. I even admit that I had that dream once. I was riding on a white horse with a page. The page had long black hair and black eyes. Severus. He looked at me and smiled. The smile looked slightly foreign one his face, but it was nice. We were laughing our heads off because we had stolen the horse from a knight. I looked back at the knight and started to laugh harder when I realized that the knight looked like a certain James Potter, the arrogant toerag…

"Lily!" whispered Mary sharply. I shook my head and looked at her. "You were day dreaming again. You almost messed up you're potion!" I looked down at my potion sadly. Why did potions have to remind me of him?

_**Maybe I was naïve,  
Got lost in your eyes  
I never really had a chance.  
My mistake, I didn't know to be in love  
You had to fight to have the upper hand.  
I had so many dreams about you and me.  
Happy endings; Now I know**_

I looked around the potions room to see if any of my friends were done with their potions. By accident, or maybe out of habit, I caught Sev's eyes. I didn't look away. I made sure I put every ounce of my pain into my eyes so that he would be able to see. I watch silently as he winced and looked down again. Why did he have to want to be a stupid Death Eater? If he had been in Gryffindor, maybe we could've had a happier ending than this.

_**That I'm not a princess  
This ain't a fairytale  
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet  
Lead her up the stairwell  
This ain't Hollywood,  
This is a small town  
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down.  
Now it's too late for you and your White Horse,  
To come around.**_

Mary had caught me thinking about that dream again. Was it my fault that it kept popping into my head? I think not. I keep on reminding myself that we just come from a small town, and Hogwarts is just a small school. So why was I dreaming of a Hollywood ending? And why did I feel sorry for the knight in my dreams when I remembered to look back?

That night something horrific happened. I had the princess dream, but instead of jumping up onto the horse with the page, I pushed him off and climbed on with the knight. I watched silently as the page rode off on a black horse into a cloud of darkness. But I just wasn't able to get over the fact that I had chosen the knight. Sure James had deflated his head and stopped asking me out so often, but did I really choose him?

**~7****th**** Year~**

**_And there you are on your knees  
Begging for forgiveness,  
Begging for me  
Just like I always wanted,  
But I'm so sorry_**

"Lily," Severus said pleading, "It's the safest path."

"You are telling me, that at the end of this year, I should go with you?" I said disbelievingly. Our 7th year had just started and he was already talking about joining the Dark Lord?

"Lily," he said as he got down to knees, "Come with me. I'll beg if you want me to. The Dark Lord might come after you because you are Muggle-born. But if you're with me, I can keep you safe." His eyes begged me, but I didn't want him to say sorry anymore.

_**Cause I'm not your princess  
This ain't a fairytale  
I'm gonna find someone, some day  
Who might actually treat me well.  
This is a big world,  
That was a small town  
There in my rearview mirror,  
Disappearing now.  
And it's too late for you and your White Horse,  
Now it's too late for you and your White Horse  
To catch me now.**_

"Don't beg. It's pathetic," I snapped, "You had your chance, and you blew it." Tears began to form in my eyes. "Good night and good-bye." I ran from him. I couldn't deal with him anymore. Any chance of friendship had been thrown out the window when he had stuck with his 'friends' for the past few years. I sprinted through the halls until I reached the portrait leading into the Heads' Dorm.

"Dragon eggs," I gasped and ran inside. Tears blurring my eyes, I ran into something very strong. I squinted up and saw James looking at me worriedly. Without pause, I threw my arms around his waist and started to sob. He seemed shocked at first, but slowly, he put his arms around my and stroked me soothingly.

"Shh…" he whispered, "It'll be okay." I thought of what had just happened. My life definitely wasn't a fairy tale and the threat of death was completely real. We were heading out into the big world, and the small town where Severus and I had become friends was fading into the distance. I needed someone who would treat me like an equal. Someone who would love me even though I was Muggle-born.

Suddenly, I realized how stupid I was being. The dream I had changed in my head yet again. I pictured the knight and I running down the road, and the page was chasing us riding a white horse. I smiled at the knight and realized that the page wouldn't even catch us. I was looking for someone who loved me, while all the time he had been standing within arms reach.

I looked up at James and moved my arms to around his neck. I gave him a quick peck on the lips and sighed into his shoulder. He was shocked yet again, but I could tell he was smiling. "Thanks for always loving me," I mumbled into his shoulder

"You're welcome," he whispered, "And thanks for finally admitting that you love me too." I smiled again. Life had finally taken a turn for the better.

_**Oh whoa whoa whoa-oh  
Try and catch me now  
Oh  
It's too late  
To catch me now.**_

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**Ok, the ending was cheesey but I'm a sucker for cheesy endings. It goes with my cheesy personality. How was it? Good? Horrible? Constructional criticism welcome! Flames hurt, so my confidence would be greatful if they were kept to a minimum. Now click the little review button!  
~Teva Faye :)**


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